It Happens to Us All...

Last night, I had this strange hankering to write a blog. But I was so delirious from exhaustion, I'm sure it would have been some sort of babble talking about things like how I fucked up my knee at work yesterday, wanting to crochet and watch the Lakers game, a YouTube music video of Franz Ferdinand's Take Me Out, how Ultra Man anpans are the best breakfast items (and would have provided image), my extreme lens envy last night that made me think of blowing my steadily growing savings on a few good camera lenses and other nonsense. It didn't happen because I wound up passing out in my clothes with the lights on, where I'm sure my roommate closed my lights and door when she came home from seeing Kate Nash.

Now that I'm awake and a little more coherent, I'd like to write a bit about Dennis Farina.

For those who aren't in the know, the former cop turned actor was arrested this past weekend for carrying a loaded gun in his carry-on luggage at LAX on his way to Chicago. To add insult to injury, the .22 wasn't even registered to him, which upped the bad doings ante from a misdemeanor to a felony.

He got the gun in Arizona, and claims he completely forgot that he had on him. And you know what? I believe him. I can relate on a much smaller scale. How is that? Well, I have this tendency to carry potentially dangerous items in places where they have no business being.

Back in 2002, when I went on a cruise through the Inside Passage of Alaska, we were going to fly into Vancouver where the ship shoved off. On the flight there, I was the randomly selected person for a more thorough search. My family joked, knowing that that person didn't know who they were dealing with when having to search my stuff. That guy had to search my bag of tricks, and when I mean tricks, I mean lots of little random junk. He did the best he could, but after running his hand through a pool of stuff, he just let me go on my way. No problem, because I had nothing to hide...or so I thought. The day before we were to return to California, I was searching my bag for something, when I discovered that amongst all the other junk in there, I had a Swiss Army knife in there. Oops. I kind of freaked out, knowing in the post-911 United States, having a nail clipper was a big deal, and here I am smuggling a multi-purpose sharp selector around. I was afraid to think what would have happened had the searcher found it, and was glad he didn't.

Going home, I just kept it in my bag, and nothing happened beyond that.

Back in the days when I had a Disneyland Annual Passport, I would just meet up with my best friend after class or something and we'd head off to the Magic Kingdom for the day. Of course, I didn't have time to switch my personal items from the bag I used for classes and going to Disneyland, so most of the things I needed for my various classes and projects went with me. One time when getting searched, I was scolded when I tried entering the park with an Exacto knife. Oops. I just removed the blade (which was sad, because it was a new one) and went on my merry way.

Good thing she didn't notice that I had the pack of refill blades on me too, and it's a good thing that I kept my box cutter in my locker.

Back in October, I went on my first airplane flight in two years. As usual, I brought a bag with me that I carried on a daily basis, thinking that I had no problem doing so. Going through the TSA Security Check, they took my carry-on bag from the line and began searching it. It seemed the agent was having trouble, so she started asking me questions.

TSA Agent: Do you have any sharp objects or weapons in your possession?
Me: No, I don't.
Agent: Are you sure you're not carrying any kind of weapon?
Me: Yeah, I'm pretty sure...
Agent [slightly flustered at this point]: Do you have a hammer in your bag?
Me: Oh yeah! I do!

So I had a little hammer in my bag. The reason I had it was because at the bottom of the handle, there were three screwdriver bits that came out of it, and one of the heads was the perfect fit for opening up my laptop hardrive section. My computer crashed earlier that month, and borrowed the hammer from work. I meant to return it, which is why I had it in my everyday bag, but the thing settled to the bottom of my bag and I forgot I had it. I was told that I could keep it, if I checked in my bag, but I couldn't do that, since my bag didn't have a zipper. I felt badly for surrendering the hammer to them, but I really didn't want to cause any more trouble than its worth. So the TSA Agent took it away, softly swinging it as if she was employing the super hammer in Smash Bros. to wherever they keep the pile of contraband they confiscate from people.

So Dennis Farina, I totally feel you, I know how it is to completely forget you're carrying something not good. but I'm very lucky I haven't been as unfortunate as you.